last day of the year. Farewell 2013

December 31 dawned misty and cool, although I know the day will develop into a warm one. There is a real stillness, a real winding down. The Dark Moon is here and the end of the year. I am feeling slightly melancholic today. My daughter and her family left yesterday after a visit for Christmas and it has left an emptiness in my life. No more gorgeous little faces at my door each morning. no cheeky little laughs or the word 'grandma' being said umpteen times when they want to ask a question. But an early morning walk, to the lookouts, soon brings me to a state of peace. The low cloud and mist, the sun glinting on the sandstone cliffs, black cockatoos enjoying a breakfast of pine nuts - all these things make something within stir. Is this gratitude? Seeing God in all.
Melancholia is a constant companion of mine and I am learning to consider it a friend of sorts. It visits and goes and over the past year, 2013, it has visited quite often along with the depression that goes with post traumatic stress. It is a long journey to wellness but I have a plan to help this journey.

first of all, every morning, I am going to take a walk into my garden and find something to be grateful for and I am going to create art around that.

And although I don't 'do' New Years resolutions, this coming year I feel a need to promise my SELF a few things. Going into 2014, January 1, a New year, my birthday AND a New Moon all on the same day.

This calls for something special, I think.

In 2014, I am going to surround myself with people who support and care for ME, I am going to moon gaze at times and lose myself in my garden, often.
I will eat good wholesome food 85% of the time and I will exercise to help my body to stay healthy.

2014 will be all about ME. Not in a selfish way but in a nurturing, caring way of self. I will stop and ponder before I make any decisions even as to what I order in a café. I will stop and think before I say yes to anyone or anything.
I am not allowing other peoples actions to upset my inner balance. I promise myself that I will walk away from friendships that do not honour or support my highest good. I will learn to take instead of constantly give.
I will journal and make art everyday. I will finish my scarf.
I will dance in my kitchen. I will go on more picnics.
I will spend time with God, sometimes in a church and sometimes not.

A new Year, a turning point for me between the Old and the New.