the past months, my life seems to be one of interior reflection. through art and contemplation.
I have been taking part in art therapy groups and creating collages to process my thoughts and wonderings, working through life issues, trying to work out why I get so angry at times, when really I am not an angry person at heart. trying to make sense of it all. where it all fits into the scheme of my own things.
of course, my life has never been a still one.. especially my spiritual life. It seems I tend to seek and search as if on some kind of spiritual quest.. never settling into any one core belief.. taking a little from here and there until I come to a comfortable place of acceptance.. for a while.
something then pushes me out of this comfortable place and my quest begins again.
and on it goes.
sometimes, this can be quite tiring.
frustrating.
and even manic.
but all the while, I am getting to know a little more of my own soul.
little by little. layer by layer
accepting of what is.
I went to Mass yesterday. to a small chapel on the south coast built in 1888
when I stepped over the threshold it was if I had stepped through the mists of time into a Sacred past, where i constantly yearn for.
the priest was chanting the Divine Office. I was surrounded by stained glass windows, ancient wooden pews polished with beeswax, the altar adorned with flowers and candles. Mary in a corner flanked by huge brass candle sticks and her feet adorned with flowers.
as the Mass proceeded, I was absorbed completely into the surroundings, becoming one with the past. so very sacred. touching a deep part of my soul. I felt as if the past was reaching out to me, through the mist, gently drawing me back to a time where I was, once. as if I had been there before. it felt as if it were a part of my ancestral memory.
the past months, my life seems to be one of interior reflection. through art and contemplation.
I have been taking part in art therapy groups and creating collages to process my thoughts and wonderings, working through life issues, trying to work out why I get so angry at times, when really I am not an angry person at heart. trying to make sense of it all. where it all fits into the scheme of my own things.
of course, my life has never been a still one.. especially my spiritual life. It seems I tend to seek and search as if on some kind of spiritual quest.. never settling into any one core belief.. taking a little from here and there until I come to a comfortable place of acceptance.. for a while.
something then pushes me out of this comfortable place and my quest begins again.
and on it goes.
sometimes, this can be quite tiring.
frustrating.
and even manic.
but all the while, I am getting to know a little more of my own soul.
little by little. layer by layer
accepting of what is.
I went to Mass yesterday. to a small chapel on the south coast built in 1888
when I stepped over the threshold it was if I had stepped through the mists of time into a Sacred past, where i constantly yearn for.
the priest was chanting the Divine Office. I was surrounded by stained glass windows, ancient wooden pews polished with beeswax, the altar adorned with flowers and candles. Mary in a corner flanked by huge brass candle sticks and her feet adorned with flowers.
as the Mass proceeded, I was absorbed completely into the surroundings, becoming one with the past. so very sacred. touching a deep part of my soul. I felt as if the past was reaching out to me, through the mist, gently drawing me back to a time where I was, once. as if I had been there before. it felt as if it were a part of my ancestral memory.
7 comments:
Utterly beautiful in its simplicity. So still and full of grace. I hope you will be able to visit there again.
dear sweet friend,
i am so proud of you robyn for your willingness to journey into the depths of your four chambered heart.
to watch you search for inner peace with such devotion and courage is inspiring.
your use of collage is most powerful and will strengthen the dialog between your soul and life challenges.
i see you in the heart of God whether you are walking on the open palm of this beautiful earth or head bowed within a perfect chapel.
all my love dear seeker, peace pilgrim, gypsy gardener.
xoxoxoxoxxoox
Sounds familiar this journey! I think we measure things by how our core responds, this is okay we are coming home to ourselves, glad to share the journey with you.
Lovely post composition and images. x
This is so very familiar. I think a lot of people have the same feelings and are on the same quest.
The purpose of life is just living life and learning from every thing you come across. The destination isn't the most important, but the journey, this is also the case with a spiritual journey in my opinion, so I think you are doing great !!!!!
Have a wonderful day.
I think some of us are simply meant to be pilgrims back to ourselves. We don't get to rest in one space very long. It is very tiring work. Work. Work. Work.
But those of us who are awake, can't just fall back to sleep. So we must do our sacred work because we've been given the grace of awareness.
The most we can do is support each other when we begin to worry that we're too much in our heads and not enough a part of this life. I hope I can count on you to be there for me as I will be there for you.
Work, sacred Bee...work.
Deeply spiritual post Robyn. I too have anger issues at times and no idea where it comes from. It's awful since I am a peaceful person. Dont think it is spiritual. I seek nothing. Your collages are beautiful. I hope they are helping you in your journey. Art is definitely healing. xoxoxo
Dear Robyn, anger is a very important part of our emotions. It hides other deeper feelings that we are too ashamed or too fearful to reveal. I have learnt that it is best to see that all comes from the Divine, both the 'bad' and unwanted and the 'good' or pleasurable. becoming angry is not pleasurable, but it shows us in the very least, that we are much more complex beings and part of the Divine Mystery, that what we realise. your visit to the church sounds beautiful and restoring. wherever you go, there you are!! your heart is sacred and it can never be left behind, so enjoy your travels and feel the close whispers of the Divine, in whatever form It appears to you. blessings, Hettienne
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