My daughter and her family, live on the far north coast of NSW. It is hot and humid most of the time up there, and it does not do my psyche any good to be in the heat and humidity. Something comes over me, I don't know what and I become angry, annoyed, impatient, frustrated and many more words that describe the heat for me.
we arrived home yesterday, to mountains mist and rain and this morning, the mist is thick. I took myself for a walk, to re-centre myself and as I walked in the mist, the damp smells took me back to the moors. Those damp earthy smells. The smell of rotting and decaying leaves during autumn.
As I walked, I knew why the heat and humidity affects me so much. I am a moors girl, I discovered that when I was in Yorkshire and walking Bodmin Moor. I am a mountains and mist girl and being away from my soul environment, takes me out of my centre. I know I cannot go up there as often as I would like. That is the truth of the matter. I must nurture myself and keep the promises that I made at New Year to stay truthful to what I want and need.
While I was away, Joe and I celebrated our 26 year wedding anniversary. We stayed at the beach for a few nights and I went foraging to collect bits to make myself an autumn equinox poppet.
"there seems to be an obvious beauty in landscapes,
wild seas and skies,
layers of light and shade...
but what about seaweed or sand?"
It didn't seem right to me to be in the sub-tropics for autumn equinox. It isn't the same as at home, where the dew sits on the ground and where the currawongs sing their autumnal song. I missed my foraging, I missed the cool nights, the colouring leaves and the opportunity to make something special for dinner. I guess I am a homebody. But all is not lost because as a friend and mentor told me last week: "in the old days in England they used a fixed date and it was called Michaelmas. Which was 29th of the month. One of the old cross quarter days". As usual, this is all topsy-turvy to the Northern Hemisphere, but I have to work with what I have. I will still be able to do an autumn equinox ritual here.I have also been away from blogging.. and the reason is that facebook took over my life.
A few days ago I closed my account because I was finding that I was reading about other peoples lives without really engaging in my own. For the past few years I have been chronicling my life on Facebook, updating my status constantly.
Telling friends what I had for breakfast, if I saw circles or hearts, I would announce it to the world. I had discussions about life and posted photos of family events. And I don't know why I had the need to tell all about my life.
I was also inundated with light, love and butterflies constantly, when, sometimes life is just not like that. Well, not for me anyhow.
And what bothers me now is that I have lost connection with those friends on Facebook and wonderful information about herbs and remedies but most of all, I have lost my thoughts and photos of three or more years of my life which is journaled there.
I don't want to go back, I want to live mindfully in my own physical life, experience life without the need and pressure to tell my status. Instead, I want to hard copy it in an art journal, creatively.
what is happening in my world here in Katoomba?
the leaves have begun to turn and fall, the wild apples are still bearing fruit and blackberries are still to be found. I have planted kale, leeks, and radicchio in my garden. It is time to prune the raspberries and I have had my apple tree professionally pruned by a bio-dynamic gardener. He pruned it on the dark moon earlier this month.
it's good to be back!
10 comments:
It's good to read your words. Nothing is ever lost, it is all there when we need it, stored safely at the core of who we are... Being at home with self is the most important thing I feel, your description of your home on the mountains is magical, I suspect this space here by the 'Apple tree at Avalon' is sufficient for your needs...
Be at peace you and your love...
Hugs x
Taking time for yourself is a good thing. My schedule of sorts is to tend to my needs, my home and hearth, what speaks to my soul then play on FB and web. When I get that order wrong and start playing on FB too much I unplug. Love you and miss you.
ahhh robyn you are like me~mists, hills, moors not heat. although i do like a nice summers day here in the forest where i can go into the trees and put my feet i one of the many streams nothing is like the cooler days.
i took myself away from fb but felt so isolated from my friends i had to go back. because they are spread across the country its the easiest way to keep in touch. i try not to get pulled in, i play no games and have stopped scrolling through the pages. i tend to now just go to a friends page if i want to see how they are. but we have a couple of private groups which keeps me off the main page.
I do know how you feel about FB Robyn and have thought many times about leaving but it's my daily connection to my family and the few friends who I really want to keep up with. I don't share much on there though and my major life events I keep private. I mostly just post snow and ice! The odd grandchild pic but not many.
Coming from England I am also a cold and damp person and much prefer autumn and winter to spring and summer. I just loathe the heat and humidity as well and become very cranky in it.
We are just coming into spring although you'd never believe it looking out at the many feet of snow everywhere but it will thaw and with the thaw come the black-flies and mosquitoes!!
I hope you really enjoy your winter..
Hi,
I'm so happy you're goign to nkeep blogging, because I lost you on FB;)
Hugs from The Netherlands
Monique Elisabeth
Hello Dear One, I am glad to 'hear' you again. It's interesting how you describe the heat and humidity. It is exactly the same for me! Even now, that Spring is struggling to arrive here, (we had snow again last night,) I don't like spring because I know that summer is just around the corner. Sigh. But, I can come to visit with you where it will be Autumn and there I can find my rest. Welcome back to blogging. I wish I had known you were on FB, I would have friended you there.
Lovely to see you back here Robyn. I have never really been a FB person. Belated best wishes for your 26th wedding anniversary and wishing you both many happy and healthy years ahead. x
Reading your blog post was an oasis of sanity after what's been for me a very intense and challenging week. I share your feelings about Facebook in regards to the "love, light and butterflies" but I'm also sick of the endless political posts. Some people seem to go the other way and see only doom and gloom and outrage. I find too much of that quite dispiriting. So far I haven't closed my FB account, just stopped logging in for a while.
I'd prefer to be part of a social network where we can share whatever is meaningful that comes up in our lives. The light, the dark, the painful moments and the breakthroughs that we experience. Family events, amazing breakfasts, whatever. So Robyn, I'll keep in touch with you through your blog. And welcome back to the mountains of mist and mellow fruitfulness!
Oh gosh Robyn. I can hardly believe that little Harry is 6 years old now. I remember when he was born, how sweet he looked. I'm happy you are back in your safe haven now. Congrats to you and Joe. xoxoxo
It is always good to know where our soul feels at home, Robyn. It gives us the strength to cope with the vagaries of life. xx
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