the first day home, I pretty much rested.. my body clock is still out of whack though and I am in a lot of pain.. it is like my body is detoxing, spiritually. Like all the ancestral memories are seeping out and I cry easily.. such a journey, such a big journey.
I will never forget the moments
of being in Lanercost Priory
of collecting water from Chalice Well...
being at the site of Arthurs grave in Glastonbury Abbey. ..
Sitting at Lands End on December 21, meditating ..
walking on Perranuthnoe beach...
many others, but these ones, had a huge affect on me.
and now
I am back in my much loved home town Katoomba.. or 'Ktown' as it is know to the locals..
my garden was looked after by a neighbour so there was not alot to do when I got home..
harvesting my garlic and weeding the vegetable garden, watering, picking up fallen apples.. it is a beautiful garden, still in early stages but I have plenty of time now, to weave my magick.
for many years while living at Inglewood in Woodford, I had a dream that I would grow old there and die eventually.. I had a dream that my family would always be around me and my grandchildren would come to enjoy grandmas garden and in summer, the pool. but circumstances changed all that.. my son moving to Victoria, about 12 hours south by car and my eldest daughter, moving north, 12 hours away in the opposite direction to my son.. so my life changed. depression set in, I know that now.. and I sold my gorgeous home and moved to another little town, closer to my mum, bought a 1970's brick veneer house and Joe and I renovated and redecorated it.. but I could not settle there and got sick.. so we decided to sell that home and move further up the mountain to where I live now.. Katoomba, a healing spot, a power spot. a sacred and spiritual place...
so where to from here?
I hope to create 'stuff'.. I still have this urge to create but right now, I don't know what... I wish to garden. I want to learn, to share.. I plan on going on retreats and join in workshops..
like I wrote in my journal last week..
"once upon a time.. I created a home for my family... now, it is time to create a sanctuary for myself & Joe...."
yesterday Australia Day..
I begin again, to tell my story...
6 comments:
Happy Australia Day, Robin! Did it have special resonance for you this year? I suspect it might.
I feel the way you feel.
I too had all these wonderful dreams how that when I retired, I would have the kids all the time and be the best gramma I could be but then life gets in the way.
We moved to where we could afford to live and one of my kids moved as well and my dreams didn't come true the way I would have liked and we are in the same situation. Just the two of us and our pets...
Hello dear one, a lot of water has passed under the bridge for both of us I think in the last couple of months! All the time you were here I was really ill, I was when you visited, I will email you.
It is lovely to see your new look blog you seem to have captured that fresh optimism, you look lovely among the flowers.
Yes our children are such a big part of our lives but at some point we just have to trust them on their journey whilst we continue on ours, I'm so glad you found Katoomba! Hugs x
Glad you had a good time on your amazing trip - and glad you're back too!
Life does have a way of throwing us curve balls! It can be a struggle to negotiate unexpected upheavals - but it does keep life interesting and the stuff we learn on the journey is often more valuable than we could ever have expected.
I envy you having had the chance to make this journey across the earth - even though it was clearly exhausting and stressful at times - but now you're home and know it's home in a different way from before; and now you are in a new starting place for a new journey, with a whole layer of deeper resonances, both those now explored and those now waiting to explore. I fear I'm not expressing this very well, but I do do envy you.
I think many of us can relate Robyn. We have also moved to where we can afford to live, with the grandcat. It is actually reassuring to read of others stories, making the most of life as it is and being kinder to ourselves it a lot of ways.
We go form thinking 'why do I feel like this?" to the benefits of hinsight,- knowing why as empty nesters, we indeed felt like that at the time. Being in the midst of it all though, is challenging, but we seem to emerge stronger and wiser eventually.
Enjoy your garden and your travel memories. Welcome home to Katoomba dear Robyn, maybe even welcome home to yourself.xxxx
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